Firearms training is an essential skill for self-defense, but many couples aren’t on the same page when it comes to gun ownership, home defense and concealed carry. While one partner may be enthusiastic about firearms, the other may be hesitant or unsure. This dynamic is exactly what USCCA Instructor Jim Kelley and his wife, Cathy, sought to address when they created their couples-only firearms training course at Cape Gun Works in Hyannis, Massachusetts.
By designing a low-pressure training experience, the Kelleys help couples build firearms confidence together. Their approach reduces intimidation and fosters a supportive learning environment, making it easier for hesitant individuals to get comfortable with firearms.
A Unique Approach to Couples Gun Training
According to Jim, many couples lack a shared understanding of home defense. His course aims to bridge that gap by educating partners without pressure or live-fire exercises.
“We found that when couples can learn in a relaxed environment, they are much more receptive to new information,” Jim explained. “We reduce the pressure immediately by telling them that our goal is simply to inform and have fun. We also remind nervous participants that they are always in control of their decisions.”
This method ensures that every participant — especially those new to firearms or hesitant about guns — feels respected and empowered.
What to Expect in a Couples Firearms Training Course
1. Firearms Safety and Home-Defense Planning
One of the first priorities of couples training is establishing firearm safety fundamentals. Partners are guided through basic gun-handling techniques, firearm storage best practices and home-defense strategies.
“By getting the facts, couples can make informed decisions on what home-defense measures work best for their family,” Jim said. This approach helps reduce fears and misunderstandings about firearms while creating a shared sense of responsibility between partners.
2. Understanding Concealed Carry for Couples
A major component of the Kelleys’ class is understanding concealed carry options for both men and women. Cathy demonstrates various carry methods for women, providing insight into firearm or holster selection, and everyday carry (EDC) considerations.
Jim highlights a key takeaway for husbands: “Never, ever buy a gun or holster for your wife without her approval!” This advice often draws laughter from the class, but it underscores an important point—comfort and fit are crucial when choosing a firearm for self-defense.
3. Strengthening Communication and Teamwork
Effective self-defense training isn’t just about individual skills—it’s about learning to work together as a team. Many couples leave the course with a newfound appreciation for each other’s concerns and perspectives on firearm ownership.
“Gun-hesitant individuals are much more willing to attend class when they can do it with their spouse or significant other,” Jim explained. Some couples even hold hands throughout the session—a sign of the trust-building process that unfolds during training.
How Couples Can Continue Training Together
1. Make Firearms Training Fun
The Kelleys’ course has shown that couples training doesn’t have to be intimidating. In fact, it can be enjoyable and engaging. Many couples continue their training by making range trips a regular activity or even incorporating “gun range date nights” into their routine.
2. Explore Advanced Firearms Training
For couples who want to take their self-defense skills to the next level, the next step is scenario-based training. These advanced courses teach coordinated movement, defensive shooting drills and real-world self-defense scenarios that help couples respond effectively in high-stress situations.
3. Develop a Home Defense Plan Together
After completing a firearms course, couples should discuss their home-defense plan. Consider key elements such as:
- Safe firearm storage and accessibility
- Roles and responsibilities in an emergency
- Communication strategies during a home invasion
- Choosing the best firearms for home defense
By working together, couples can enhance their preparedness and ensure they are both comfortable with their self-defense strategy.
Why Every Couple Should Train Together
Firearms training for couples is about more than just learning how to shoot. It’s about building confidence, improving communication and creating a shared approach to personal protection.
Jim and Cathy’s program has proven that a well-structured, welcoming class can change perceptions and empower couples to take charge of their safety. Many students leave not only with the knowledge to apply for their concealed carry permits but with a newfound appreciation for training together.
Whether you’re a seasoned gun owner or new to firearms, training as a couple can enhance your skills, strengthen your bond and provide peace of mind that both partners are prepared to protect themselves and their family.
