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The Anti-Gun Boyfriend: To Date … or Not to Date?


A few weeks ago, I posted a blog about some thoughts and suggestions for wives whose husbands do not support firearms ownership or concealed carry. Things got even more interesting recently when I read a question on a social media page dedicated to women and guns that asked: “What are your thoughts on dating someone who is anti-gun?”

Out of 304 replies (at the time of this writing), nearly every single answer to this young, single woman’s inquiry was “NO!” While some ladies offered hopeful tips and suggestions for possibly educating the anti-gun boyfriend — and even changing the guy’s mind — nearly every woman who replied gave a resounding “No way!” in the form of posting a funny, head-shaking, “Just say no,” “Deal-breaker” kind of image or by sharing a story from their own personal experiences.

I got pretty exhausted reading through all of the replies, but I can share the gist of the conversations. While some of the responses actually questioned the boyfriend’s masculinity for not approving of or appreciating firearms, many of the women stated (and I would concur) that finding out the reason why the boyfriend was against guns was an ideal place to start. Was it different political views? Was it conflicting foundational values? Was it just the gun itself … or was it the concept of having a firearm?

If the source of opposition or disapproval was based on some form of misinformation or miscommunication, perhaps there was a chance to come to a general understanding or a compromise. Maybe the boyfriend was influenced by other anti-gun people but hadn’t really thought the whole issue through. I have seen people change their minds, become more willing to listen to different views and even embrace what used to be opposing ideas. Sometimes just living the responsibly armed lifestyle is enough to get some people to realize, understand and even support why we do what we do.

But any deep-seated beliefs against firearms (or against the 2nd Amendment) would clearly be a problem. A person should never get involved in a relationship thinking he or she will change or “fix” the other person. One lady, in jest, even quoted from II Corinthians 6:14 in the Bible, sharing: “Do not become unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” While she knew those verses were shared out of context, the overall idea here is true … that it’s just not a good idea to develop a close relationship with someone who is against your core values or against what makes up part of who you are! Several women also pointed out that while it might be fine to disagree in the beginning of the relationship, the stark differences regarding the significance and the importance of our right to self-protection would be impossible to ignore and would likely become a never-ending source of conflict and resentment.

Love can definitely be blind, and opposites may oftentimes attract, but when it comes to personal protection and safety, the majority of people seem to agree that it’s best to build a relationship with someone who agrees with — and fully supports — our right to bear arms. I know that I feel very blessed that my spouse supports my right to protect myself and my family. And, even better, I’m blessed that he’s ready and willing to do the same, right along with me … or for me.

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